The Bold (No Worries)
Schools, churches and even some businesses have signs out front that feature a changing message. We drive by and are treated to an insight or a chuckle—or both. One such impromptu encounter in the mid-’90s had a big impact on me.
The sign outside the school said, “Worry is the worst misuse of imagination.”
A quick web search revealed that the original quote, attributed to author Dan Zadra, says, “Worry is a misuse of imagination.” I was a little startled to learn that because I had just recommended his book, 5: Where Will You Be 5 Years from Today to a group I was facilitating online the evening before. I have his book, but I hadn’t realized that he was the author. I had been too busy filling in all the tantalizing blanks in this interactive story.
He is right. Our lives are a direct result of where we devote our thinking.
The Whisper (Here Comes the Wall)
The race is tight, and the cars move as though they are one giant, roaring creature. Turn after turn slides them around the track, banking up snug to the wall that separates the spectators from the track.
Suddenly, one car lurches, nudging into the car beside it. The driver of the impacted vehicle feels his wheels waffle as the car begins to veer, threatening to skid. Instant action is required as the barrier wall looms, coming closer.
It is tempting to look at the wall as it grows larger. The wall is danger, harm, disaster. The driver wants to avoid that. The wall demands focus.
However, if the driver wants to survive, the focus must be on the open track. Brain follows eyes and hands follow brain, so the wall must be ignored, or the steering wheel will begin to point where the eyes are focused. Instead, the driver looks left, watching the open space into which the car must travel to be safe. Brain follows eyes. Hands follow brain. The proper adjustments are made, and disaster is averted.
The Proper Dose of Concern
The driver cannot ignore the reality of the wall or disregard the skid. They are a real threat. However, it is more important to focus on the preferred outcome in order to activate every resource to achieve it. The driver must look away from the wall.
The wall deserves only enough attention to determine that there is a challenge. The focus belongs to the solution.
When we face a challenge, it is important to acknowledge the problem, gather the data necessary to understand the threat, the parameters, the resources, and the stakes. After that, the bulk of the thought, focus, mental energy, and creativity is best spent on preparing for a response and pursuing a solution.
The Threat of Worry
Worry is the practice of spending extra energy focusing on what can go wrong. It saps our vitality and draws us away from creating solutions.
Worry is addictive because it feels appropriate. Surely, we are supposed to focus on this horrible threat we’ve identified. We don’t want to be blindsided by danger.
Worry is hard to overcome because it can take hold of our thinking and push out all other thoughts, which is dangerous in itself. Worry does not leave any room for any other considerations.
Worry is not, however, a solution. Worrying is not honorable work. Worry has never solved a single problem and it can create health and wellness problems of its own.
What, then, is the antidote to worry? The antidote is carefully placed focus on the desired outcome that acknowledges there is a challenge but does not focus on disaster scenarios.
Look at the clear roadway, not at the wall.
Questions to Help Find the Clear Roadway
When you’ve identified a potential wall looming in your future, try asking yourself questions like these to begin to focus your attention away from the wall and towards the road you want to take:
- Given this challenge, what would a better outcome look like?
- What would be the best outcome for this situation?
- What resources do I need? To whom do I need to speak to gain perspective?
- What action could I take right now that would lead to the desired roadway?
By turning your head away from the wall, you allow your eyes to lead your brain and your brain to lead your hands. Avoid the wall by placing your focus on where you want to go.
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